You've heard the term echoed through crowded gym locker rooms, on MTV, and in the news. But it's what you don't know about rape that could save you from becoming a victim. According to the U.S. Justice Department, sexual assault occurs every two and a half minutes in the United States. It could happen anywhere - at a party, walking home from school, or at the mall. It could happen any time - day or night. It could happen to anyone - male or female.
And yes... it could possibly happen to YOU.
However, the good news is that there are things you can do to help prevent your becoming a rape victim.
Communicate Directly. Make sure that you are assertive and mean what you say. "No" means "no." Your date should understand that it's not an invitation to persuade you to have sex.
Stay Sober. The use of alcohol and drugs dramatically increases your chances of becoming a rape victim. It impairs your ability to take action and to think clearly - and for some, it may bring out sexually aggressive behavior. A large percentage of rapes occur because victims and perpetrators are intoxicated.
Stay in a Group. Avoid being alone with someone you don't know very well.
Develop a Safety Plan. Keep money with you in case of emergency for phone calls or cab fare. Have the names of two people to call to pick you up in case you decide to leave your date early. Tell other people who you are going out with and where you will be.
Help Your Friends. If you see your friend getting into a dangerous situation, let them know. "You could be saving your friend from becoming a victim of sexual assault - or from committing one," says Berkowitz.
Trust Your Intuition. If something feels wrong - it usually is. Don't brush your feelings aside because you feel they aren't important.
Believe in Yourself. Have the strength to walk away from any situation you find uncomfortable.
While these suggestions may decrease your risk of attack, it is important to remember that not all rapes can be prevented. "No matter how cautious you are, avoiding danger requires some luck, too," says Berkowitz. "There are many cases.... when there's absolutely nothing that could have been done."
The reality is that rape is a horrific crime that often leaves its victims feeling powerless and alone. Healing from such trauma takes time, so be sure to give yourself the space need to recover. And above all, remember that you have the power to take back your life and the courage to change it. Just leave it all to God and He'll find millions of ways to help you overcome those events that keep haunting you.
Thanks to: Elizabeth Donovan (Psychotherapist specializing in Sexual Assault Trauma)
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